Dumb stuff!

So the first month of 2012 has come and gone. Wow! Must I say wow! It goes so quick! I'm so excited for spring I just can't stand it!
Let me get the bad stuff for this month out of the way.
I know we often find ourselves or maybe it's just me.... throwing pity parties over dumb stuff like being childless, fat, poor, working full time with not much reward, etc. You know....all that DUMB stuff! And I can’t seem to get out of this rut! I’m so annoyed with my-self. Not only because I know how incredibly blessed I am and how things could be so much worse! But also because I have the power to change things especially my attitude! Let me explain a little bit of what’s going on in my mind!
Last year I had gone on weight watchers and did it quiet successfully. I lost over 30lbs in 3 months! However, I backed off my insulin in order to do it. BUT I was happy with the results! Because I had backed of my insulin in order to diet (dieting as a diabetic doesn't go well it makes everything twice as difficult! I am being totally honest I’m not the best when it comes to dealing with difficult things. And I know it’s all just excuses excuses excuses! Anyway.....) the result wasn't only weight loss but loss of sugar control. I had to get it back under control! It was long and hard road! My body had adjusted to the lack of insulin support so when I was getting everything back on it all BACK FIRED! I had gotten a really bad cold in October my sugars where so high the meter couldn't even pick make a reading! (Meaning they were over 500) I started upping my insulin. It took about a week or so to get them controlled but because I had such high sugars my body started retaining everything! My eye sight was also affected. Let me just say that before October I weight 40lbs LESS than I did come December! I put on that much weight because my body freaked out. I went on diuretics but it didn't help! With the diuretics I was expecting to even be peeing like a race horse but it didn't happen. The Dr couldn’t up the dose unless I went on constant supervision and moniteration of common side effects. Me nor my Dr felt that it was necessary since the only issue I was having with the water weight is that my pants and shoes didn’t fit. I have had to live with this weigh gain. It sucks when you no longer have to wear a belt with your fat jeans! I even weight more now than I did a year ago. I'm officially obese! I'm 100lbs over weight! I'm so ashamed especially with my disease! This has not been good!
Scott tells me over and over "but you are healthy you eat healthy your sugars are better"..... But it doesn't help when I look in the mirror and see the weight! It's hard enough dealing with the fact my clothes don't fit, and that I have to literally move my belly to the side just to shave my legs! I can't express how tempting it is to go off my medication again. My body will burn everything and get rid of everything (like fat and water) to flush my blood with stuff to lower my sugars! But I must not! I will not! I will have to work extra hard now to drop the lbs.! This means not just really focusing on cutting out calories but fat. I don't struggle with eating sugary foods for obvious reasons but I do struggle with fat! Example: I don't opt for margarine over butter, who wants to drink skim milk?, Turkey bacon? Really???..... Also I need to get my butt in gear and get more exercise!! I work a full time job and really don't care to go to the gym or even do Zumba on the Kinect before or after work. But now that Scott is only working only 1 job ;) he can be my exercise buddy. I hate HATE running especially in place and my little legs and my huge midsection make it incredibly painful to do ellipticals! So the plan is to play some B-ball, soccer, swim, weights, and bikes! We still are in the process of deciding if we should join a gym. (This is part of the reason why I'm anxiously waiting for spring.)
It’s hard for me to have faith and encouragement in my-self. I don’t have a great track record when it comes to eating really healthy and exercising! But I think that’s what I like about blogging! If I get it all out there in the wonderful web for people. (I’m going to pretend that people will read this) Than I will be held accountable even more! I think I also might do a video diary and take pictures of my-self for motivation. (Not sure if any of them will be made public). So here is to hoping I can pull this off and at least get down to a weight both me and my Dr. will be happy with! :)
Now the good part of this blog!
I was so fortunate to be able to see my favorite band twice in 1 month! Scott and I were not planning on going to see them on New Year’s because I had bought really expensive tickets to see them in Wendover later in the month. But on New Year’s Eve I got a “tweet” from the tour manager saying that he had a “New Year’s present” for me. (I hadn’t mentioned on twitter that we were not going nor had I asked for M&G!) So I flew up to Park City as fast as my little bug would carry me so that I could see them that night! They put on an amazing show! (Like always!)
I had been trying to persuade my beautiful friend Audri to come with us to Wendover since she is a fellow fan. To my surprise and utter excitement she came. She had the great idea of riding the “fun bus” to Wendover. What an adventure that was! But it was nice to not have to drive especially because of the weather that day! Audri invited another gal and I invited another friend of mine. So it was Scotty and a bunch of girls! I had made hats for the bands kids and a hat for their band manager and I was actually surprised but Bobby (manager) loved his hat. (See below the hat Scott is modeling) Jimi (cute brown headed guy in the band) said that Bobby looked like Zac Brown! ;) Becky (Phillip the other cute guy in the band's sweet wife) sent me a tweet with a picture of the hat to say thankyou!

The concert was amazing! Scott and I were front row joes! It was fantastic! Phillip came over to the side of the stage where we were sitting and handed me his guitar pick! I can't express how much I just love that band and the people in it! Anyway..... Audri got a drumb stick! It was hilarious! We gambled a bit and Audri's friend did really well at Roulette! A lady that was on our bus hit a jack-pot! Oh ya and I had won bingo on the bus! It was a great time! Hope we can do it again sometime!! GOODTIMES!!

A {Year} in Review

So I've seen many people document the past year on their blog. I thought I'd give it a try and see if this old lady can remember month by month what 2011 happenings.... happened! :)

January 2011
Scott and I spent New Years in Kanab with my parents. It's always nice to go down and see them because you can keep things really low key if you feel like it or go out and have adventures if your feeling adventurous!

This is what Kanab looked like a year ago! Look at that snow in southern ut! Especially compaired to now!

Mom crochetted a head band for Kea during our visit. Isn't she cute! ;)

February 2011
Ok so all of you who like February or who have birthdays in February please don't take offense but this is the month I loathe more than any other month! January I'm still getting over the holiday high so I can deal with the snow and cold for a little longer. But come February I get so sick of snow and cold. The temps might get a little better but all that does is melt some of the snow so leaving everything dead brown and muddy. It's hard remembering stuff!
PS I have to refer back to facebook and look at my pictures to recap my memory here are a few!
My kiddos chillen on the bed during a cold Feb day. :)

Oh yea and don't forget Valentines Day! I have the best husband in the world!

March2011
Since we had moved into our current home I have looked forward to warmer weather. I love the backyard. I was anxious to do some yard selling to find some great things for the yard and i did!
As you can see! :)

Here we are enjoying the hammock I crammed into the trunk in picture above.

I took my nephews out for a fun day of movies, food, and The Living Planet Aquarium. I love this picture cause they are such boys. Cute boys! :)

March also brought out a change. I started Weight Watchers (which so far is the only realistic way for a diabetic to "diet" that I've found). I also decided to change my hair. I can't believe how different of a look this was

April 2011
In April there was alot of huge weather mood swings!
We got a ton of snow on April 3rd and April 30th.

In between snow storms we had nice warm and sunny weather when things started to breen and bloom. :)

I also experianced my first Pedicure with my Momma inlaw and Sister inlaw. :)

May 2011
Come May I had done Weight Watchers for 3mnths now and lost just over 30lbs. I could have kept going and lost as much as I wanted but I decided to be done not only because dieting bites but also because I had backed off my diabetes meds so I could drop the lbs easier. Not smart and not recommended but sometimes necessary for me to drop the lbs!
Another look. I'm sorry I have hair style ADD. :)

Scott sold his car and we traded in my car so Scott could get a truck. It's been so much fun! We took his new truck on a 2 weeke vacation starting Memorial Day. Even though most of it was spent during June it started in May so I'll post it here. We spent a few days in Kanab with my parents playing in the desert and at the cabin. Then we spent a few days in Phoenix with Scott's Dad, Wendy and Scott's sisters. I also saw a long lost dear friend! It was a great vaca!

June 2011
June was definantly the high light of last year! Molly had her kittens the day we got home (pics posted in July post). The weekend we got home from vacation we needed to find a little car for me so we shopped shopped shopped around I decided my little heart yearned for a "Slug Bug". So we shopped shopped and did more shopping. Then......
"VUALA"

We also went on a camping trip with Scott's dad Brandon's family. It was a blast!! I taught Scott how to fly fish. :)

July 2011
July was full of drive in movies, zoo, and BBQs!
Scott and I had the my nephews for our now anual sleep over in July. We went to the zoo and drive in. They were some tired boys! So much fun!

Molly had her babies in June and they had started to get their personalities and I remember being so excited to come home from work and snuggle with them! Molly was a great mom! :) My mom took one of the kittens and it's fun to see my grand daughter and how special she is to my mom. Ps She is pregnant again! (Last litter I just wanted 1 more chance to snuggle with kitties)

We had a high school friend and his wife over on the 4th of July for BBQ and fireworks. I must say we oftern don't host so I haven't quite gotten the hang of it. But it was fun!

We also had a BBQ at Scott's mom's house with the "hood". I love this picture. Very manly men! ;)

August 2011
In August we enjoyed a great family vaca to one of the most beautiful places on this planet Yellow Stone. Scott's uncle has a beautiful cabin in Star Valley that he so graciously let's us crach. :)

For my birthday present we went to see the best band ever Little Big Town. They rarely come do a show with just them in UT so it was a treat. Plus it was in Park City! Perfect setting for perfect music! We also walked the streets of Park Ciry for "Park Silly". It was a fun (crowded) little fair.

My beautiful friend let Scott and I bum with her to a Real game! LOVED IT!

September 2011
For Labor Day Scott and I decided to make another trip to Kanab. It's something we like to try to do not only because there is usually a great family BBQ for grandpa's birthday at the cabin but it's also the last time we can hang at the cabin it is shut down for the winter. :)

October 2011
October was filled with sleep overs with out little sis, corn mazes and trick or treating!

November 2011
I had been making jewelry and doing fairs with my sister (who does vinyl) for quite alot of years no but just started a new hobby. My mom taught me how to crochet when I was in high school and in September I decided that I would take a stab at crochetting hats! My sister was over a craft fair in Escalante where she lives and I invited my-self to sell my jewelry and hats. My parents dressed up like Mr. and Mrs. Clause. It was so much fun. Becky hooked us up with a gorg room in a beautiful bed and breakfast. I wish I had taken pictures of it also for Thanksgiving Becky, Dean and Jakob spent Thanksgiving with us in our little home. It was not like moms but we made due. :)

Scott and I also got pictures taken. They turned out super cute even though I still have all this water weight on! ;) (See slide show below)

December 2011
We had alot of Christmas parties and the usual hustle and bustle with getting ready for Christmas. I realize now that I have been slacking off on the picture taking. I need to remind my-self to do better! We spent Christmas with my family in Kanab. I know I keep saying this but it's true. I love Kanab!! My dream is to have a little cottage in Kanab. I say this all the time to Scott as well. I know I'd be skinny if we lived in Kanab because I can't get enough of that beautiful red desert!
Kea and her Jingle Bells

Charger hats I crochetted for my nephews for Christmas.

The year ended off with a band for me. I got to see my favorite band again in Park City on New Year's Eve. Their manager sent me a tweet saying he had a "NYE present" for me which turned out to be a M&G. Normally you have to request them or ask and I did neither so I was so STOKED! He's my new favorite friend! ;)

Wow! What a year! Recapping all of this has really opened my eyes and reminded me how incredibly blessed I am. I have so many moments where I've thrown my-self a pity party because of my current situation of being a diabetic with PCOS, childless, not owning home, having to work full time that I forget how fortunate I am. I'm so grateful for my job and a boss who is so understanding. I great family and support system, wonderful friends. And the most amazing, kind, generous, supportive, loving, forgiving, spoils me rotten, husband whom also has a great job with great medical benefits that I so desperately need.

Here is to 2012. May I find more happiness not just with dreams coming true but with what I already have. To being able to overcome the trials that are yet to come and the hope of doing this blog for 2012 a year from now and be filled with as much gratefulness that I feel now. I hope that you all will have a wonderful 2012 filled with happiness!

Thank you my wonderful friends and family for being so AWESOME! You made my year what it was filling it with laughter, sunshine, joy, excitement, blessings, love, hugs, peace, and GOOD TIMES!